As a coach, I have the privilege of learning my clients' stories; it's so fascinating to discover where they've come from, and how they've become who they are. Equally intriguing is exploring every client's relationship to their story. Some have a positive relationship, others negative; so the question I have for you: how do you feel about your own story?
You, like everyone else, no doubt have choices, moments, and experiences in your past that you've considered alternative outcomes for. In fact, you may have significant traumas you wouldn't wish upon your worst enemies. Equally, I'm sure you've experienced amazing highs and successes which you remember fondly. Every one of these moments has contributed to the person you are, and who you want to become.
Knowing your story -- and more importantly, owning it -- is so very empowering. Even if you regret or wish you could do things differently, it's important to remember two things: the past cannot be changed, and you are who you are because of who you were. Re-writing beliefs and limits that no longer serve you is entirely within your power; how they've affected you in the past cannot be changed, however, so it is crucial to frame the way you think about these experiences in a positive way. Depending on circumstances, this may be difficult to accomplish; when you've lived through real trauma, it can be tough to put a 'positive spin' on it.
You can achieve this level of acceptance and positivity by owning and learning from your past. Accept that which you cannot change, and choose to learn and grow from the experience. It doesn't mean you accept wrongs done to you, or no longer care about any hurt you may have caused; rather, it's about not creating the artificial weights of blame or guilt which keep you from moving forward in your life.
The story of you is unique because no one else can experience it. You may have been born with every opportunity imaginable, or required to move mountains for every inch you gained. For these, and every place in between, you have compiled a unique story from which to draw from. Learn from your mistakes; be humble in your achievements; expand; grow; own who you are. Only when you've come to terms with your past can you truly draw strength from it. And once you do, you're ready to use that strength to become the person you ultimately want to be.